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My Inner Struggle

You are here: Home / Life / It’s a feeling I’m after

It’s a feeling I’m after

10.19.16 | laura | No Comments

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Although Wednesday is my official weigh in day, I’m trying something new; daily weigh ins. It’s been keeping me in check the last two weeks. So I am happy to report week two, I am down another 2 pounds, bringing my October total to 4 pounds! One pound at a time, one day at a time, I’ll get there.

 

This was the first week my mindset training with Amy, has focused on actual weight loss.  Until now we’ve focused on training my mind to think more clearly, and to be more open.

 

Last week I had the pleasure of meeting up with Amy and a potential new trainer, Teddy.  I’ve been undecided what to do about working out/gym for weeks, I’ve been looking for a change and to feel inspired to do something different. I need something that I’m excited to do, that I won’t dread doing alone, and that I can do any time; with my crazy schedule I need to fit it in any time from 5 am to 8:30 at night or if I have a free moment in the middle of the day, oh and that doesn’t cost a bajillion dollars – is that too much to ask?!

I am not sure what will pan out with Teddy, he seems super nice and motivated to help me. I am trying to create my space for home workouts. He’s going to come over next week to help me set up and offer some suggestions on what to get and how to set it up. I am excited for this because if I do have some free time during the day but not enough to drive to the gym and back I can do this. I still love getting out of the house for a run, spin etc. but this way I have options.

We talked about goals “where do you want to be?” I had a hard time answering, I have a number in mind (160) but that’s not the end all be all. So I explained…it’s not a number I’m after, it’s a feeling. He loved that.

 

A huge part of my struggle is confidence, it sort of drives everything. I know I’m not alone. It affects all of my relationships.  If I’m not feeling confident about work, I won’t try my hardest or show what I am actually capable of. If I’m not feeling confident in myself as a mother or wife, I question everything I’m doing as well as everyone else – and that never ends well.

I hope to not always struggle with this, although I can already feel a difference. I already don’t care as much as I once did, baby steps. I hope this all makes sense.

 

I’ve also been practicing the daily affirmations Amy has given me.  I have them hanging above my kitchen sink (what mom doesn’t spend a good portion of her day in the kitchen?).  My favorite one by far is: “I am creating my future right now – regardless of circumstance”. This means a lot to me right now, making the most of what I have in this moment. I also toss in a few of my own everyday “Be yourself, be badass, be sexy, Be confident” and some from Michelle “Strong, Happy, Healthy, Kind”.

 

XO

Confident, Strong, Happy, Sexy, Healthy, Kind, Badass 🙂

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